Heather Versus Webster

The spider killing gear...


I tucked my pants into my socks so the spider couldn't jump to the ground and crawl up my pants leg. Pretty clever of me, huh?

The target..

So this is the smaller of the two spiders - the bigger one is still missing (eek gives me the shivers to think about). And yes, as you might imagine, every dust particle that moves makes me jump 10 feet in the air :o(


The hunt...
I spent a span of 3 days debating how to kill this spider. I tried to find an indoor spray, but read on almost every can that it was not wise to spray the spider directly - although it didn't say why? I'm imagining this mutant spider coming at me even faster and more angry, with a foaming mouth and red beady eyes. Now that the first spider is dead, I have purchased a spray that is supposed to kill on contact. I plan on prevention spraying as much of my apartment as possible.

The kill...
With all my might, I couldn't convince myself to swat at this spider on the ceiling. And after many hours of standing and starring at the damn thing, I ended up finding a more much suitable person to kill this spider. Thanks Wei! Now, if Wei (or some other white horse riding spider killing hero) could please be available every time one of those critters finds his way into my apartment, all will be well in the world of Heather.

It's never ending!
I did research online, and basically every time it rains, spiders will come inside. I also happen to live in an apartment that is ideal for spiders. There are so many different little dusty corners that I can't see or can't reach to vacuum or spray, it's quite stressful to think about. My solutions so far are 1)hire pest control people and make sure they get ladders to reach all these stupid little corners and such. 2) move to a newer, less spider infested apartment...the latter is sounding much more appealing.

Surviving without electricity

I've lived almost 4 nights now without any electricity. Now, this wouldn't be too bad except for a couple of things.

1) It finally got cold in Melbourne or I forgot what 'cold' used to feel like. I almost put my winter coat on to sleep last night it was soo cold.
2) No hot water is just miserable when it's 15 degrees outside - I think that's in the 50's?
3) I'm 27 and still scared shitless of the dark. This is like some sort of sick therapy for a woman that slept with the bathroom light on for the last 4 years, and wouldn't dare walk into a dark room without turning on the light. And to top it all off, for some brainless reason, I passed up the posh apartment in Richmond (mainly because it was next to a prostitution house and didn't have washer/dryer connections) for an 'old Irish pub' turned apartment. Now for all of you who know me, shame on you for not reminding me I have a habit of attracting ghosts. Remember the toilet paper ghosts who like to shut the door to the bathroom at my first Austin apartment? Well the ghost here likes to walk across the wood floor upstairs and then in a flash start making a 'snap snap snap' sound from the kitchen. I nearly peed my pants last night when it first happened. Then I told told the ghost I was tired and going to bed, and he seemed to have left me alone.

That's it for now, night is setting in, and I'm freezing my nipples off - so to bed I go.

Great Ocean Road Trip

Bucket List Items Accomplished:
1) Driving on the left side of the road (without any major errors)
2) Driving the Great Ocean Road to see the Twelve Apostels (which is really 5, 7 drowned).

I will have to fill you in on the details in a later post.
In the meantime here are some pictures.





There were a couple of amusing signs.
This is me demonstrating what not to do.


One of the many coastline views during the roadtrip...

We have a WINNER!

...don't look now, but I've signed a lease on an apartment.

In total, this process will only have taken:
31 days (by the time I actually move in)
3 different hotel rooms
$2260.53 for the 3 different hotel rooms
852 hrs (I'm making that up) of internet searching
...and the constant pestering of the people who know me.

I've attached videos and pictures of my apartment so you can appreciate the current place I call home. I should note, I'm thinking about breaking my lease and moving to a less 'exposed brick/spider loving' place. I can't deal with big hairy spiders everyday.


Downstairs


Upstairs

Blokes, Hoons, and Sheilas

A little vocabulary lesson for my fellow Americans...

Bloke - of the male gender (whether that be by God's creation or a really good plastic surgeon), this is a character we've all encountered. He typically wears 'smart' suits, and has a bit of smart-ass arrogance.

Hoon - again, typically male, with an abnormally high level of testosterone while driving. This societal pest drives with reckless abandon and a sense of entitlement over the roadways. The less politcally-correct American's refer to their mode of transport as 'rice-bunners' (Side note: I'm yet to see a real manly pick-up truck)

Sheilas - stay tuned, all I know is I wouldn't want to be referred to as a Sheila

There are some other things like:
...chips are actually fries
...lollies are any sort of candy
...boot is actually the trunk of a car
..."large long and black" is what I have to try and say every morning with a straight face to the barista making my coffee
...ice hasn't been invented yet
...and beers come in oddly termed sizes (middy, pots and schooners - I still don't know which one is bigger), but that isn't too shocking.

When someone asks "How are you going?" they don't want to know by car, train, or bus...they actually mean "How are you?"

I'm sure this list will continue to grow, I will be sure to keep everyone well informed.

Got a little story for ya Ags...

It's a small world...and a big Aggie Family
As most anyone who knows me knows (did I say that right?) I am an Aggie. Along with the many Aggie jokes comes the immense pride of being an Aggie, dreadful football seasons, and a network of people that spans across the world. Being one to test everything I've been told, I thought it would be nice to attend Muster (Aggie tradition for our fallen Aggies) in Melbourne this year. I got on the Former Student website, found contact information for someone in Sydney (about 11 hrs by train from Melbourne, I think) and emailed this person. I mainly wanted to see if she by chance knew any Aggies in Melbourne that were going to hold Muster. Well she passed my name on an Ol' Ag (Fightin' Texas Aggie Class of '73) who emailed me. He was very welcoming, told me all about his family, his time at A&M, and invited me out to the farm he and his wife live on, just outside of Melbourne. He suggested that his son, 28 yr old male (just in case 'son' needed clarification), help me with the train/tram route to their house, as his son lives in Melbourne. I wrote said Ol' Ag back, thanking him for the generous hospitality, and told him a little bit about myself. I also mentioned that he could pass my contact information along to his son (to be honest, I had a glass of wine or 3 before writing the email and was feeling rather serendipitous about the whole situation). Well, this guy didn't just have a son, my age, who live in Melbourne BUT his son....wait for it....wait for it....works for the same company I do, in the same field that I work in - now if that doesn't make you believe in 6 degrees of separation, I'm not sure what will!

Queen Victoria Market and Royal Botanical Gardens

Aside from apartment hunting (which I'm tired of talking about and people have to be tired of hearing me talk about), I found my way to two very interesting places in Melbourne.
1) Queen Victoria Market - Basically like a farmer's market, but huge! And so full of life and savory smells. It really made my day, and gave me hope that not everything in Melbourne is ridiculously priced. I was beginning to feel like I moved to NYC with the cost of a bottle of water in this place.
2) Royal Botanical Gardens - I'm sure I only covered one tenth of the possible paths, but I can definitely see this as my new Town Lake Saturday morning jog. I sat an had peppermint tea with some fresh made scones (yummy!) in the Tea Garden, and then walked passed not one but two weddings. It's a lovely time of year, and the perfect setting for a wedding, although you basically invite the general public to watch your ceremony (which I found to be a little impersonal and fishbowl like). Oh well, they seemed happy.

Today, well today (which is Easter Sunday - more about that in a minute) I will go check out some more apartment locations, and finally catch up on all the administrative stuff I've been putting off.

Side Note: Easter in Melbourne is a big deal. I'm talkin' hot cross buns at work on Thursday (yeah, I had no idea what they were either) and tons of chocolate: chocolate bunnies, chocolate eggs, you name it, they've made it. Apparently this is the last big holiday for months, so I guess it's go big or go home. Being that I'm not very religious, I wasn't planning to get in on any easter egg hunts, but, as a woman, I feel I am entitled to the discounted chocolate tomorrow, and plan to be at one of these fancy chocolate shops to get supplies for winter.

To the left, to the left...

I was all determined to teach myself to walk to the left side. My thought: If they drive on the other side of the road, they probably walk on the other side of the road. WRONG. It's just clusterfuck on the sidewalk. You zig, then zag, elbow, and knock down the elderly to get a walking lane. I've concluded that the reason walking 'to the left' doesn't work is because downtown is a melting pot of cultures, some of which drive on the left, some that drive on the right, and the remainder are people that disregard any logic or orderliness and just drive where ever there is space.

The things I wish I brought with me...

...a tall dark and hansome American man (Australians tend to be shorter)
...a Keurig coffee machine - at $3 AU a cup, I'm going broke fast, and they don't make simple coffee machines in this country? Can we say market begging for life simplifying products?
...my Pontiac - I loved that litte car. I hope she found a new home that loves her as much as I did.
...a spare set of legs, I can only walk so far everyday (on the positive side I've lost over 10 lbs walking my little ass off.
...Sonic care electronic toothbrush - the closest thing they have is the crappy Oral B kind...and drumroll for the price - $230.00 AU (and the conversion rate doesn't make that cheap in the US).
...my BLACKBERRY - omg I miss my blackberry.

And so it begins...

I've packed up what I could fit into two 50 lb suitcases (and cheated by putting the rest on a ship) and moved to Melbourne, Victoria, Australia (future referred to as "Melbourne" or any learned shorten form). The information to follow will be my own ramblings on the typical 'Heather' moments in life and other thoughts of what life is like in Melbourne.

I will do my best to keep it interesting, but sometimes life as an auditor falls short of 'entertaining'.

Feel free to email or reply with your thoughts, comments, or own personal experiences.